It was embarrassing telling the doctor I used medical marijuana.
After thirty seconds of silence, I realized he was going through something else on my chart
I don’t know why, but I was embarrassed to tell my doctor I used medical marijuana. He turned and looked at me in question, because he was asking if I was taking any other medicine, either prescriptive or OTC. I sat there and stared at him, then I whispered I was using medical marijuana. I tried to explain it wasn’t pure marijuana, but it had more CBD than THC. It worked to take care of my aches and pain, but I never used it to get high. I felt like I was a little girl caught with my hand in the cookie jar right before dinner was put on the table. He sat by the computer and just stared at me. A part of me wanted to confess I did get high on the first batch of medical marijuana their pharmacist suggested. I hadn’t gotten high since, and I didn’t want to. I hated how I felt when I was high, and I swore if it ever happened again I was going to call the state. I would give my medical marijuana ID card back to the state, and they could keep my application fee. After thirty seconds of silence, I realized he was going through something else on my chart. He was talking to me about the results of my recent bloodwork, and I was still obsessing over admitting to using medical marijuana. I waited for him to tell me he thought it was wrong, but there was nothing further said. When I left his office, I waited to hear some of the nurses tittering that I was the girl who was using medical marijuana and admitted it to the doctor.