I have always looked up to my father.
Even though I haven’t seen him more than a handful of times over the past 10 years, I think about him all of the time.
When I was young, we talked on the phone all of the time despite the distance. In particular, we bonded over music and movies. He’d send me CDs and DVDs for birthdays and holidays every year, along with whatever video games were popular at the time. My dad exposed me to a lot of amazing music early on. This was in the late 1990s when classic rock radio was becoming a formidable force on FM airwaves. I remember listening to bands like Pink Floyd, Led Zeppelin, and Black Sabbath. But as time went on, my dad and I started to drift apart. When I reached high school age, we were no longer talking on the phone every other day, and once I got to college we rarely spoke. Now it has been 10 years of me rarely seeing my father because of how far away he lives. He’s happy to answer all of my questions regarding high performance lighting and marijuana cultivation. It’s an interesting topic to him, since he has always had an interest in exactly how cannabis is grown. He even tried making a DIY cannabis grow cabinet a few years back when recreational marijuana was legalized in his state. But beyond talking about growing marijuana and the lights needed for the task, he keeps to himself. I don’t know if he cares anymore if we see each other or not, and knowing that makes it hard to cope.